Okay, so first thing is first.
I realise that there may be several people from my work who will see this post and website on account of what’s been going on -this website is a personal one and does not reflect the views of my employer or colleagues. There is bad language, mockery and a small amount of abuse here – it’s all tongue in cheek and those who know me, know it’s meant with a certain level of affection and not to be taken seriously.
The Birth of “Crashy McCrashy”.
That being said, today we decided we were going to go and visit a real shithole for a small amount of time – Ayr. In our defence, it was more about the back roads getting there and back than the destination, but you gotta have a waypoint, and Ayr was it today.
The day was going well with the trip down – lots of back roads, good views, good weather and m new comms system was working beautifully – it was the first time I was on intercom with the lads and the chat, while a bit nerdy, was decent.
We were being our usual selves, when about an hour later something went mildly wrong for me on a back road over toward Moniaive.
So anyway – I took a small, unscheduled, flying lesson. Coming around a right hander, at around 30mph (really!) and my bike slid over to the left slighty, fell into the gully where the verge was meant to be, and from that moment on, I was bound for a short amount off airtime and a fair amount of pain.
Yup – I high sided. and wound up about 40 feet down the road from where it happened. I even made noises as I landed on my arm, my head scraped down the road, the air drained from my lungs and I was left lying in the middle of a back road in a few pieces.
I wouldn’t recommend it – if you have to do it though, don’t tuck your arm underneath you – turns out that can break a few bones.
At that point my ride was over, and there’s not much more of my story to tell – I was down, but not out. The lads I was riding with doubled back and triaged me, and the emergency services were called.
Boys – thank you. You literally saved my life. I owe you big.
Don’t think that means you’re getting anything expensive at Christmas though.
This leads me to the other real stars of this story of this – the NHS.
From the initial phone call to 999, using the what3words app (get it on your phone now! Stop reading and download it from here. I’m serious.) they were on the scene in under 20 minutes, and from there they took me to DGRI for an exam and next plans.
What3words gives you a three word phrase that identifies EXACTLY where you were when it all goes wrong – for example, mine was \\mastering.apron.greet. It’s so much more accurate than saying “about halfway along this back road near a corner”. Make the 1st responders lives easier, and extend yours, by using what3words – honestly, get it installed now.
David
A visit to the ICU, a week in hospital to get the pain management sorted out, and I was more or less tagged and released back into the wild. Hell, even the food was good when I was there. Genuinely.
If you are considering for a 7 day holiday with a private room, TV and internet access, all inclusive with good food – I would love to recommend it, but please don’t go there.
Others in the community need their help, and I’m damn glad they weren’t fully booked when I needed them.
Heroes – every damned one of them.
Luckily my injuries were limited only to a few broken bones and a bruised lung – nothing cranial.
See – making as much sense as always.
For you other riders out there: I was wearing full kit – A Scorpion EXO Air 520 helmet, RST Kevlar jeans (with knee and hip protection), paragon 6 jacket (with shoulder, elbow and back protection) and RST gloves, as well as some good sturdy boots. The jeans have some light scuffing, the jacket is missing a zip pull and has some battle scars now, but the gloves and helmet are toast. It made the difference and kept me breathing. Don’t doubt the benefits of quality kit.
Wear the gear – if I was wearing any less protection, or was going 5-10 mph faster, I’d likely not be here to tell you about this. Spend the cash, and get the best you can afford that fits properly.
Now – I need a new helmet, and gloves, and to get the bike fixed up for the summer.
See you out there, and unlike me, try to keep it rubber side down.